Surgery day 10/3/23

A lengthy vulnerable post about one of my many issues!

One day, Eli was 10 years old, I was his soccer coach and we were playing basketball at the park. The next day, I had a terrible fall, I never went to the doctors to get it checked out, and to this day I have extreme pain in my legs and knees that cause bone on bone and pain when I stand or walk. This moment caused me to sit on the sidelines while my family enjoyed the game of life.

Two years ago, I saw myself in a video and decided, “Enough is enough!” and started looking into weight loss surgery. I use to think that it was an easy way out for people who didn’t want to put the work in. But after several years of treadmilling, lifting, fad dieting, gym membershiping, I realized, “Enough was enough.”

After 2 years of seemingly 1 step forward and 2 steps back with scheduling, appointments, etc… I wanted to just stop, because of being let down. The message on Sunday at church was about embracing failure, looking at it, and not letting it make you fearful to still trust. Instead embrace it and live life. As I look back that’s what I did!

I involved myself in groups, asked a bunch of questions, heard personal stories, etc… I’ve learned that weight loss surgery comes with its own set of issues with family, emotions, hormonal changes, etc… but so does out of control high blood pressure, bad knees, borderline Type 2, and out of control A1C levels.

For me I saw it similar to:
-A builder using power tools and heavy equipment to tackle a big job
-Weightlifters using powders to get their body’s to respond quicker
-A chef using kitchen gadgets to enhance their ability to cook
-A guitarist using pedals to help with their sound
-Drivers using GPS to reach a destination
-Photophargher using lighting or filters
-Smokers using a patch

Each one uses a tool to help them specifically with a complicated issue they’re facing BUT they will have to be involved in the process.

It wasn’t until last week that I realized that being an emotional eater doesn’t mean you eat when your sad, depressed, or lonely. I ate to put a smile on my face, change the channel on my thoughts, or to continue to enhance the joyful experience of the people that I was with. ALL OF THESE ARE EMOTIONS. I didn’t use drugs or alcohol to deal with the emotions BUT I did use food in an unhealthy way. I needed to put my pride aside and say out loud, “Enough is enough!”

Thank you to EVERYONE that has had weight loss surgery and has given words of wisdom and support in these last 2 years! I’M NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT IT, I’m going to miss a full rack of ribs that made me feel like “the man!” The goal, Lord willing, is to be “the man” that plays on the floor with his grandkids!

This post is to inspire anyone fearful of what people might think, to look at yourself and ask, after all of the trying and failing… when is enough of enough? Explore your triggers, seek support, and find the tools for change!

In hindsight… did I really need to eat a full rack EVERY TIME????